Dishonourable Members — MK joins the seventh Parliament

Members of the uMkhonto Wesizwe Party,Arthur Zwane,Nhlamulo Ndhlela and Andile Mngxitama arrive at Parliament to be sworn in by the acting judge president of the Western Cape Patricia Lynette Goliath , as new members of parliament for the 7th Administration.(Photo : Phando Jikelo / Parliament of SA)

By Rebecca Davis

25 Jun 2024

The 58 representatives of the MK party who did not participate in the initial swearing-in of MPs earlier in June finally did so on Tuesday — providing some surreal moments.

It all felt a bit like a fever dream.

There was John Hlophe, one of only two judges ever to be stripped of their position in the democratic South Africa, being sworn in as — could it be? — the official leader of the opposition in the seventh Parliament.

That’s not a figure of speech, to be clear. The leader of the opposition is a real position, as laid out in the rules of the National Assembly and in the Constitution. To quote the Parliament website: “The leader of the opposition — a leader of the largest minority party (or largest party that is not in government) — enjoys a special status in Parliament. The post is specified in the Constitution and is accorded a specific salary, though the holder has no specific duties in terms of the rules.”

Duduzile Zuma-Sambudla, Sihle Joel Ngubane, John Hlophe and Khayelihle Ngubane in Parliament at the swearing-in ceremony. (Photo: Phando Jikelo / Parliament of SA)

The uMkhonto Wesizwe (MK) party’s internal hierarchy remains entirely baffling, as befitting a party which is essentially a shell operation around one man — former president Jacob Zuma. But with Hlophe confirmed as the party’s chief whip, it appears likely that unless the ongoing negotiations for the government of national unity (GNU) collapse and the DA returns to the opposition benches, impeached judge John Hlophe will be the official leader of the opposition in the seventh Parliament.

There was Hlophe, holding up his right hand and promising to “obey, respect and uphold the Constitution and all other laws of the republic” — the legal system he refers to as a “shitstem”.

At the Good Hope Chamber in Parliament on Tuesday, Hlophe was one of two people in the room who had lost their jobs as a result of a parliamentary vote and were now entering the National Assembly as part of their revenge arc.

The other was the disgraced former Public Protector Busisiwe Mkhwebane, herself an EFF MP, who was there to cheer on her husband David Skosana, a newly minted MP for MK.

There had been talk in advance of MK filling its benches with an all-star team of alleged State Capturers from the Zuma era: Prasa’s Lucky Montana, Transnet’s Siyabonga Gama, Eskom’s Brian Molefe. Why not? After it was reported that MK’s chief negotiators post-elections were Tom Moyane, the man accused of almost collapsing SARS, and Firepool Minister Nathi Nhleko, it seemed eminently possible that the Montanas, Gamas and Molefes would be sworn in as MPs.

But in the end they were not. It was unclear until the very last minute exactly who would be showing up for MK — which the party is likely to try to spin as evidence of some sophisticated political strategy, but is more plausibly attributed to the organisational chaos which appears to beset the party (and which, again, happens when only one person has the authority to take decisions).

Let us not forget, after all, that MK could be governing KwaZulu-Natal right now. The fact that it is not is something that, once again, the party will attempt to present as part of a brilliant longitudinal political plan — when it seems clear that in reality, the party simply bungled the moment directly after elections because there is no clear party hierarchy or communications structure. (Even on social media, one can see MK supporters daily begging the party to clarify the authorised mouthpieces.)

Read more in Daily Maverick: Judged, disgraced and now recycled — Hlophe’s return to the main parliamentary stage

So, who are the 58 MPs representing the party in Parliament?

A few familiar faces

Some, including Hlophe, were not on the original list submitted by MK — which led a few experts to question the legality of this, though Parliament’s legal advisers must surely have weighed in on the matter.

In the end, the list of 58 MPs consists largely of no-name picks — although journalists will be working through that list furiously in days to come, to try to piece together the internal ecosystem of the party and to see if there are any hints as to the party’s mysterious funding sources.

But there were a few familiar faces.

There was Des van Rooyen, unkindly nicknamed either “Two-Minute Noodle” or “Weekend Special” for his whirlwind tenure as finance minister under Zuma, spanning 72 glorious hours between 10 and 13 December 2015, until the threat of South Africa’s economy crashing forced his removal.

Van Rooyen wore camouflage to his swearing-in, which ironically made him stand out as the only person from his parliamentary cohort to proceed in this sartorial direction. Van Rooyen also appears to be one of relatively few people within MK to have served as an actual operative of Umkhonto weSizwe (the ANC’s military wing).

For the rest, dark-coloured male suits were mainly the order of the day: MK does not seem to have adopted the gender quotas of its birth party. A splash of colour was provided by the lime-green outfit of Muvhango soap star Phindile Gwala, whose appearance caused quite a stir until it was sadly clarified that Gwala was there to support her “spiritual mother”, Bishop Nokwethemba Mtsweni, rather than to be sworn in herself.

Andile Mngxitama arrives at Parliament to be sworn in as a new member. (Photo: Phando Jikelo / Parliament of SA)

We had to make do with Black First Land First leader Andile Mngxitama, whose last significant appearance in the public eye was circa 2017 — when it was revealed that he had asked the Guptas for money and received instructions from London PR firm Bell Pottinger, the firm run exclusively by rich white people which popularised the term “white monopoly capital”. (Mngxitama’s former handler Victoria Geoghegan will doubtless sleep easier tonight hearing that the new MP told journalists on Tuesday that he was joining Parliament to continue his fight against white monopoly capital.)

But there was only one true star of the show; one belle of the ball.

That was Duduzile Zuma-Sambudla, daughter of JZ, beaming from ear to ear throughout proceedings — despite having told The Shady PHodcast earlier this year: “I don’t see myself in Parliament. ‘Point of order!’ Listen, I’ve got better things to do, hey.”

To understand what those “better things to do” are, please feel free to visit Zuma-Sambudla’s TikTok account, with the warning that it will make you feel, well, poor.

A recent video shows her in a private jet, while the voiceover — originally from a Nicki Minaj appearance on a late-night talkshow — says: “I don’t fly on those kinds of planes”, with reference to conventional passenger air travel.

Zuma-Sambudla also told journalists at the national results centre, while MK’s astonishing vote tally mounted in a surreal fashion, that an MK government would save the economy by “probably [looking] at things like the repo rate to assist in bringing down food prices or whatever”.

The repo rate is set by the Monetary Policy Committee of the South African Reserve Bank, but whatever.

Zuma-Sambudla could be on the finance standing committee; Hlophe on the justice committee. (More seriously, it is entirely possible that Hlophe could end up as an MP on the Judicial Service Commission, tasked with interviewing judges.)

Buckle up, countryfolk, for the seventh Parliament. DM

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A few familiar faces