Financial abuse is not gender-bound — how to recognise the signs

Financial abuse takes many forms, from controlling relationships to crippling child maintenance battles, affecting women and men alike in South Africa.

According to Bertus Preller, a family law and divorce lawyer at Maurice Philips Wisenberg, signs of financial abuse include:

• Control over resources: This includes the perpetrator taking complete control over budgeting and all monetary resources, often denying the victim access to their own funds.


• Restricted access: The victim might find their access to joint bank accounts limited or entirely cut off.


• Monitoring expenditure: The abuser might supply an inadequate allowance to the victim, keeping a stringent check on every penny spent.


• Career sabotage: The abuser may prevent the victim from working or even go to the extent of sabotaging their job opportunities.


• Misuse of funds: Taking the victim’s salary without their consent or using their credit card without permission.


• Identity theft: Fraudulently using the victim's identity to secure credit, further trapping them in a cycle of debt.


• Deliberately avoiding financial contributions: The abuser might deliberately avoid working or contributing to shared household expenses, leading to financial strain for the victim.

Financial coercion

The Domestic Violence Amendment Act 14 of 2021 recognises economic abuse as a form of domestic violence, including coercing individuals into financially debilitating situations. Economic abuse encompasses the deprivation of financial resources or economic support to which one is legally entitled or requires for survival, often through manipulation, isolation or coercion.

According to the Statistics SA’s 2022/23 Victims of Crime Survey, economic violence is a pervasive issue in the country with more than half of women in abusive relationships reporting that they are trapped by financial control and economic abuse.

The report reveals that a significant proportion of women have fallen victim to various forms of gender-based violence, including physical and sexual violence. However, what often goes unnoticed is the pervasive presence of financial abuse in domestic violence cases.

Divorced fathers also fall victim to financial abuse

While the report highlights the prevalence of physical and sexual violence against women, it also underscores the often-overlooked issue of financial abuse in domestic violence cases. However, financial abuse is not limited to one gender – men also undergo significant financial strains.

Gary Da Silva, chairperson of Fathers 4 Justice South Africa (F4JSA) explained how men, particularly those who have children are also affected by this form of abuse.

“Financial abuse occurs when one party, typically fathers, is forced to pay unreasonable or unsustainable maintenance amounts, which exceed their income, often under threat of limited access to their children,” Da Silva said.

While fathers have a legal and moral obligation to contribute financially to their children’s upkeep, maintenance orders should be fair and based on their actual ability to pay. Unfortunately, many fathers are coerced into agreeing to excessive payments, exacerbating the issue.

Da Silva said, “Fathers are often bullied during divorce or separation into agreeing to exorbitant maintenance orders they cannot realistically afford, with threats that failure to comply will limit their access to their children.”

South Africa’s high unemployment rate, with nearly 60% of employable citizens without work, further complicates the issue – many fathers struggle to meet the high maintenance amounts imposed on them, leading to severe consequences.

In such cases, access to the child is often used as a bargaining tool, worsening the situation. This scenario is all too familiar for many individuals experiencing financial abuse.

‘Always financially stressed’

Speaking to Daily Maverick, Jessica Pillay – a financial adviser at Momentum Financial Planning, said financial abuse includes individuals who are “working, however, never have any funds or are always financially stressed”.

Fortunately, resources are available to help individuals experiencing financial abuse. “Always seek advice from a professional financial planner – this will help them to always receive guidance and have the backup of a planner to give them sound financial advice to protect their finances,” she said.
“Some strategies for rebuilding credit or financial stability after experiencing financial abuse are budget planning and financial planning. Review income, expenses and work out a plan to recover and rehabilitate yourself financially,” Pillay said.

When it comes to tying the knot, Pillay recommends that couples “work on their finances before marriage. Have a structured plan in place before marriage as well as discuss the different options of marriage contracts before you get married.”

“It’s never too late for change. Change starts with you. The first step is seeking help and maintaining this in order to achieve your final goal,’’ Pillay said. DM